In a previous blog, Chronicles of an Exclusive Pumper: What would you do?, I referenced a hypothetical question about if a magic pallet of formula appeared should I continue to pump or not?  Welp, that has become a reality, kinda.  A pallet is not exactly the truth but I received 42 containers of formula.  I was faced with the decision of whether I wanted to continue to pump or start to wean slowly.  But my thoughts were halted when I came down with my first round of mastitis (Chronicles of an Exclusive Pumper: The Dreaded M Word).  I had several clogged ducts so rather than slow down on the pumps I had to push forward and pump extra to work out the several clogs.  A couple of weeks later I am still sitting here befuddled of what I should do.

You know what the worst part is?  42 containers of formula sounds like a lot, right?  Well, my husband and I ran the math.  The bubs still have around 30 to 32 oz of milk/formula a day.  That break down is roughly 24 oz of breast milk and 8 oz of formula.  In addition, they also eat three rounds of solids and puffs.  My boys like to eat.  So, doing the math on how long the formula will last a container will last 3/4 of a day.  One container will not even last a day!! That’s crazy.  So, this supply won’t even last a month.  So, sounds like I will be pumping for a while longer.

But some things make it so hard to push forward like the MOTN aka middle of the night pump.  I hate it with a passion that burns deep into my soul.  It is literally the bane of my existence (right now that is because I know this too shall pass).

If I could pump and go back to sleep with minimal time it wouldn’t be so bad.  However, I get up whenever I wake up.  It can be anywhere from 12:30 to 3:00.  I like to wake up around 1:00ish to pump however I get the most milk production around 3:00.  If I wake up around 3:00 there is about a 85% chance that I will not fall back asleep and that makes for a really rough day.  I only pump for 15 minutes when I get up in the middle of the night but I go downstairs to put my milk away, check the baby monitor and go back to bed.  Not like I am doing anything too crazy but I find myself lying back in bed and letting my mind race.  I have tried varying breathing and relaxation techniques.  I try to lay there and clear my mind but then shortly there after it wanders off still and then before I know it I have already been laying there an hour.  By the time I am about to fall back asleep there comes the stirring of the babies and its time to start the day.

For my supply it seems that the MOTN pump is what helps me to keep feeding these babies.  Most of the time yielding my second highest milk production of the day.  The first thing in the morning is always the most.  Oh, how I want to get rid of it.  It really is an internal conundrum for me.  But for now I will keep foraging on and know that I am in the home stretch.  The babies are 9 months old and at their 9 month well visit the doctor said that by 11.5 months I can start them on cow’s milk (slowly).

What keeps you pumping mommas motivated?

Also, see Chronicles of an Exclusive Pumper: What boosts your supply?